If Your Favorite Fairy Tale Characters Shopped at Pop Box
Once upon a time…in a land far, far away…lived a bunch of fairytale creatures with web-enabled devices that could order subscription boxes from Pop Box. Wait. That doesn’t sound right. The creatures from my favorite fairytales didn’t have Pop Box! But I’ll bet some of their stories would’ve gone a lot better if they did…
The Ugly Duckling
Once upon a time…an ugly brown little duckling hatched into a group of otherwise normal-looking ducklings. And they would not let him forget it. The story goes that the ugly duckling, after being teased mercilessly though his adolescent years (really hits close to home, doesn’t it?), grows up to be a beautiful swan. If only the duckling had Emma & Chloe, he would’ve been the flyest fowl in the bunch (pun VERY intended). With all of the new jewelry that would’ve come his way, he would’ve been the talk of the flock right off the bat.
Once upon a time…there was a cursed princess, destined to prick her finger on a spinning wheel and fall into a deep slumber. Not if she had some Moustache Coffee! With new and unique coffees coming to her house once a month, Princess Aurora would be way too caffeinated to sleep. She’d be able to stay up for days on end, spinning wheel or no spinning wheel. The entire kingdom would be saved! All thanks to an everyday cup o’ joe.
Three Little Pigs
Once upon a time…three little pigs lived peacefully in the forest. Until a nearby wolf decided it was dinnertime. He started going around to each of their houses trying to blow them down (sounds like a lot of work to me). If the wolf just had Home Chef, he wouldn’t need to go out and chase pigs around. His food and all of the necessary accompanying spices and seasonings would be delivered right to his door. That way, everyone wins – the wolf gets his food more easily, and the pigs live to build houses out of more random crap!
Once upon a time…there was a maiden locked away in a tower by a witch. She wanted desperately to be free and see the world with the prince who would visit her. Not if she had Night In Boxes! With all of the necessities for a perfect night indoors, Rapunzel would much rather chill in her tower than go outside. Why go gallivanting around the kingdom when you can hang out in your fuzzy socks, eat snacks, and watch Netflix?
Goldilocks and the 3 bears
Once upon a time…an innocent little felon broke into the home of three bears. Not to steal anything! Just to eat their food and take a nap. We all know how the story goes — Goldilocks tries out the bed of each of the three bears before she finds one that’s juuuuuuust right. But if the bears had a Burrow couch, she wouldn’t have needed to try their beds at all. With totally customizable couches from Burrow, she could’ve made their couch feel just right! I mean, it’s still not an ideal situation, but do you want a grimy stranger in your bed? Gross!
The moral of the story is: don’t you get trapped by a witch or a wolf. Get a subscription box and save yourself from fairytale woes. And they all lived happily ever after.